Embracing Change: My Journey to Authenticity

Everything that is happening now is happening for my ultimate good. Over the past year, the universe has thrown so much at me that it can't all fit into this small post, but it has led me to reconnect with my unapologetic, authentic self. I am building a life for myself, and my instinct is to retreat and handle everything life throws at me on my own.

I remember the day I broke down at work. The weight of it all became too much, and I couldn't hold back the tears. Overwhelmed and vulnerable, I was expecting judgment, but instead, a colleague hugged me tightly. As I cried and kept trying to apologize, she held me and whispered that everything was okay, and that I was okay.

In that moment, I realized something profound: we all need a hug. We all need the reaffirming words, “It will all be okay.”

Opening up about my struggles was a turning point. My apartment move had been a disaster, with services and bills in complete disarray. I am navigating life as a newly single, pansexual woman, divorced and trying to redefine my identity in spaces where I once felt I had to fit a specific mold.

I used to be seen as the married, straight woman who always had everything together—or at least, always stressed about having it together. Meanwhile, I was silently battling depression and anxiety, struggling to keep my head above water.

The truth is, I am grieving and healing parts of my life that were shaped by an image of what I thought a ‘good, perfect woman’ was supposed to be and do. I was living the life of my past self, neglecting who I truly am.

I am not perfect, and I never have been. I am divorced, but I am best friends with my ex-husband. I am pansexual, and still learning about my sexuality. I am passionate about connecting with the Millennial and Gen Z Latinx population through sharing my life journey. I have worked in spaces that allowed me to be a reflective listener and advocate, and I found joy in making connections through sharing the challenges I've overcome.

Fear has kept me from admitting the truth and speaking it with confidence. But no longer will fear define my strengths. I listen to my fears for caution, but I no longer let them stop me from taking chances.

My Saturn return has signified a new phase of life. It’s a time of releasing what no longer serves me and embracing who I am meant to be. This journey is not just about finding solitude, but about finding myself within that solitude.

To anyone reading this who feels overwhelmed, lost, or unsure, remember that everything you’re experiencing is shaping you for your ultimate good. You are not alone. We all need a hug sometimes, and it's okay to seek out those moments of connection and reassurance.